BAGGIES ARE USEFUL

The main deal with the band is showing up. If you miss a wedding, there’s no second chance.

Plumber: Ma’am, sorry I couldn’t make it yesterday. I’m here to fix your toilet.

Musician: Ma’am, sorry I missed your wedding yesterday. OK, kill me.

Weddings are the Rolls Royces of working-musician gigs. Nobody wants to be a wedding-singer except real musicians. They die for wedding gigs. The money is good and there’s usually good food. Now, we’ll occasionally get “wraps,” but 90 percent of the time we get the same food at the guests — which is always salmon. Can’t be in a Jewish band without liking salmon.

I had one guy in my band who used to bring baggies to all the gigs. Particularly useful at buffet lines.

The band always eats after the guests. That means we need to bring snacks — or eat a ton of hors d’oeuvres — to tide us over.

I always write “client will provide staff meals” in the contract. And I underline: “This must be arranged ahead of time with the caterer.”

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